The Shortcut That’s Costing You Everything

Yesterday, I took my kids for a walk. Sun shining. Nice breeze. Everything was going great until my daughter got an idea.

“Shortcut!” she yelled and sprinted into a muddy field.

Two minutes later?

Knees deep in mud. Shoes lost. Tears streaming.

And guess who had to get in and pull her out?

I wasn’t mad. It was a lesson. One she won’t forget next time she tries to skip the path.

But most men in marriage? They don’t get that same luxury.

You don’t get to “try” the shortcut and just backtrack when it fails.

You don’t get to throw a quick fix at the problem and expect her to reset.

You don’t get to say, “Let’s just talk,” and have her magically open up.

That’s not how it works.

Keep taking shortcuts and:

– She stops trusting your words

– Every conversation feels like a battle

– You start walking on eggshells just to keep the peace

– One day, she stops reacting at all. That’s when you’re in real trouble.

Because when a woman stops caring, she’s already halfway out the door.

And most men? They don’t even realize it’s happening until it’s too late.

They keep pushing when all she wants is space.

They keep explaining when she’s already checked out.

They keep throwing random “fixes” at the problem and wondering why it’s not working.

It’s not about more effort. It’s about the right steps, in the right order.

Here’s why this order matters:

-Try to change how she sees you (Step 3) before lowering her defences (Step 1)?

—>She’ll think you’re just putting on a show.

-Try to get her relaxed (Step 2) before she believes a shift is real (Step 1)?

—>She’ll be scanning for your motive the whole time.

-Rush the “make her reconsider” moment without safety beneath it?

—>She’ll pull away and mean it this time.

If you don’t get Step 1 right, you never get to Step 3.

Because no woman reconsiders when she’s still defending herself from you.

It’s like asking someone to admire the wallpaper while the house is on fire. You’re talking intimacy, she’s looking for exits.

That’s why I’m running Do the Right Thing at the Wrong Time workshop this Friday, 20th June.

Because lowering her defences (Step1) is where everything either opens up or shuts down. And most men get it wrong without even realizing it and keep making the same mistakes.

Inside the workshop, I’ll show you:

a) Why her guard stays up even when you’re “saying all the right things” so you stop stepping in it every time you try to connect.

b) 7 things you do that instantly turn her off (even with good intentions) so you quit shooting yourself in the foot and finally get a real response.

c) How to drop the pressure you didn’t realize you were putting on her- so she stops bracing every time you walk in the room.

d) The one shift that makes her stop protecting herself from you so she actually wants to stay in the room without you chasing her down.

When you get this right?

If she doesn’t feel like she has to brace for your words, then she starts to actually hear them.

If she’s not scanning for the next disappointment, then she can stay in the moment with you.

If she stops feeling like you’re a threat she has to manage, then she can start letting her guard down.

And if she finally feels safe around you, then she doesn’t just stop pulling away & she starts leaning back in.

🗓 Friday, June 20 🕓 4PM CET / 3PM UK- replay included

Grab your ticket here.

See you inside,

Klaudia

P.S. If you don’t fix Step 1, she’ll keep shutting down no matter how “right” the rest of it feels. But if you do? You won’t have to chase anymore. She’ll stop running. She’ll come closer

P.P.S Can’t make it live? You’ll get the recording+ the resources delivered in your inbox the next day.